Question #1: Who’s eligible?
Different skin color doesn’t matter (1:5,9). Referring to her skin in Song of Solomon 1:5 she says “Dark am I, yet lovely…” She’s insecure about her dark skin. But Solomon says: Don’t you worry about the color of your skin. That makes no difference to me. You’re as exciting to me as a mare is to a stallion (v.9)! A number of years ago after a funeral I conducted I attended the luncheon the family of the deceased was hosting. I was seated with a bunch of strangers. Across from me was a married couple of different ethnicities. Well the father of the guy says to me right in front of his son and daughter in law: According to Genesis, God created each species according to it’s kind. He was saying this to express his disapproval of interracial marriages. Talk about feeling awkward! I couldn’t even believe what I was hearing! And to think he was trying to justify his racist views by quoting Scripture! It was infuriating! Friends – the Bible is clear – skin color doesn’t matter. Don’t turn someone down just because their skin doesn’t match yours. That would be a huge mistake.
Different socioeconomic status doesn’t matter (1:6). In other words, it doesn’t matter if they are rich or poor. Solomon was the son of the king – he was rich as rich could be. She, on the other hand, came from a working class family and had to help take care of the family vineyards. This is how her skin got so dark – because she was out in the sun all the time working in the fields. This was not something wealthy people did in those days. Working in the fields was for poor people. A couple years ago the television show Downtown Abbey was all the rage. In the time period in which that show took place you didn’t marry someone that was below your socioeconomic level. You tried hard to marry someone as rich as you were or someone even richer than you were. When Lady Sybil fell in love with (and then married) Tom Branson (the family’s chauffeur) it almost resulted in her being excommunicated from the family. But you should never turn someone down because of their socioeconomic status – especially in this great country of ours where with a little hard work and some perseverance, anyone can make something of themselves. So they don’t need to have your same skin color and they don’t need to be rich, but they DO need to be two things…
First, they must be a Christian (2 Corinthians 6:14). Second Corinthians 6:14-15 says “Don’t team up with those who are unbelievers. How can righteousness be a partner with wickedness? How can light live with darkness? What harmony can there be between Christ and the devil? How can a believer be a partner with an unbeliever?” NLT To best understand this New Testament verse, we need to look at an Old Testament one. Deuteronomy 22:10 forbade yoking a donkey and an ox as a work team on the farm. In 2 Corinthians 6:14-15, Paul is borrowing the image from Deuteronomy 22:10 to teach the Corinthians that a Christian and a non-Christians are forbidden to be yoked together, in the same way a donkey and an ox are. Why? Because Christian values and pagan values are not compatible!! Nevertheless I’m always blown away at how many Christians are willing to date people who aren’t. I’m also amazed at parents who allow their Christian children to date people who aren’t. Here’s why it’s so dangerous. Imagine someone standing on a chair and another person standing on the ground. Would it be easier for the person on the chair to pull the person on the ground UP? Or would it be easier for the person on the ground to pull the person on the chair DOWN? In the same way, it’s easier (morally) for the non-Christian to pull the Christian down than it is for the Christian to pull the non-Christian up. This is why God in His wisdom has forbidden such relationships.
Second, they must be the opposite sex (Genesis 2:24). If they aren’t the opposite sex they aren’t eligible for a Christian. Genesis 2:24 says “That is why a man [a male] leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife [a female], and they become one flesh.” Anything other than a man with a woman or a woman with a man is to settle for less than God’s best.
The color of their skin doesn’t matter. Their socioeconomic status doesn’t matter. But they must be a Christian and they must be the opposite sex.